Nugget

Burkelle

What can I really say? I saved the best for last. Or is it only because you are the oldest that I have so many thoughts about your life? The first time we met was in the hospital, sure. But the first time we really met was when you were enamored by a giant gold pin I was wearing. You grabbed it with your baby hand and wouldn't let it go, and then you just looked up at me smiling this huge smile. I think you knew that we were going to be friends.


Hoarder of jewels and keeper of the boys
you scare me because of
that (almost fearless) defiant look
you remind me so much of myself

I do not love that you are already
self-concious

I will never forget when I lived across the hall and
you would wake up in the mornings and jump on my bed
We would dance to
O Celia, you're breaking my heart
you're shaking my confidence baby
singing the words with all of our breath

Now, when I come over
you are busy
you are the talk of the town
your friends are much older than you are
and you have very important birthday parties

But sometimes I still get to have you all to myself
I tell you special secrets
just so you make that little face you do:
your mouth gets small, your cheeks red, and your eyes squint
I tell you
so that you know I love you and
so that you will keep giving me the best hugs

and I think that
although you plan on giving
everyone else in this world trouble

I'm not on the list.

You lost your top and bottom teeth at the same time
and you look the prettiest when the sea washes all the sparkles out
of your hair

Yesterday, at the beach,
you cut your finger on a seashell.
I carried you and your sunburnt freckled nose
to shore and
you kissed my cheek with your
salty mouth.

"Do I Dare?"

I'm in Cleveland for a couple weeks right now, and I've been going to some of the thrift stores I used to raid back in high school. Today I saw an old man in a white and blue pinstripe suit at the checkout counter of Unique Thrift with his wife, who was wearing all pink with a huge straw hat. They were having so much fun together, and they were buying more ridiculous clothes. I believe that how you dress matters, but I also believe that it should be fun. If you are stressed, anxious and self-concious about what you are wearing, or you are dressing to please others, it takes the joy out of putting on clothes. The old man in the pinstripe suit was clearly liberated from self-conciousness, and he was the biggest fan of his own outfit. Ok maybe his wife was, and then him. I told the couple they were my fashion heroes, and then decided I needed to make a post about it.

Whether it is the person who is wearing the outfit, or the outfit who is wearing the person, here are some of my favorites:

Sounds of Summer

I have been listening to some musak this fine summer-break. Here is a random sampling of some lovely tunes. Maybe you will like it, maybe you won't. Maybe you'll dance, maybe you can't. Mad props to my lovely sister Bean for helping me find some of this schnazzle.

Re-loving Band of Horses:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o7_s9H0BRrU&feature=related

... and here is a remix of the oriJ. that I really like (PG-13, kids):
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MiCCcOP3ay4&feature=channel

Loving Florence and her remake of Beirut (also a great band):
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2p5l6tRzpD8

Dancing to Edward, always:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h0RQnGhxZzg

Also dancing to MIA (I wanted to post Tell Me Why, but I can't find it):
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o3S41UgR_Fs

Sometimes I sing this in the car:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xoDUElvucGg

Kid Cudi's new album may have been one of the best purchases I made this summer:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i1t5kZPVt7M

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tJa5_2wqN_I&feature=related

Album Leaf for chill rainy nights in Cleveland, like tonight:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t3sf3aejhKg

Lykke Li for little dance parties in the solitude of your very own apartment in the ghetto:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vFCif_h36Gw

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=upnTg2GPgTM&feature=related

Still not sick of this song by Stateless:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V3b1CDLsiGU

Maeleigh Joy

How dare we call you unplanned

(yet sometimes I wonder if you're really here)

You are lighter than a small brown feather, the fluffy kind

When you open wide your gunmetal eyes

they feel as sharp as a knifepoint

which draws back quickly upon being discovered

Your lips are like a little bird

I see your mind hopping through the grass as

You so inquisitively

so carefully

take the smallest bite

of pink frosting

from the tip of my spoon

in the morning sunshine.

Female Support Continued...

In my last post about this topic, I mentioned several ways that females harm themselves. I had a male friend ask, almost as if he was offended, if I thought those errors were limited to "just women." My answer: in the case of the bra advice, yes, this is (hopefully) an error limited to females. All the other errors could be made by men too. I just notice that, as a woman, I make these mistakes, and I see my female friends, coworkers and family members doing the same. I could write about errors that men make, but that would be a different blog :)

Here are a few more things from the list:

• Women hurt themselves when they don't develop relationships with other women. This one is huge and it probably deserves a post of its own. In fact, my friend Bri and I are going to write a book called You Need Your Bitches. Having healthy relationships with other women can be extremely difficult, but it is essential to be a healthy, happy woman with a sense of humor and a good perspective. I lived in a house with six ladies for two years. Living my life so close to them, day after day, was challenging in so many ways. Before I lived at Westover house, most of my friends were dudes. The ladies were a whole new world. We were able to call eachother out in ways that our guys friends probably wouldn't think about or want to confront us about. Having strong friendships with eachother was easy for the first few months, and then when the party died and the shit hit the fan, we had to make the choice to stay committed or bail. We stayed committed, and I can say that we pulled eachother up out of or through big piles of poo. I know I wouldn't be successful in the ways I am today without their annoying questioning, their tough love, their advice I didn't want to hear, their laughter, and the food they brought to our giant wooden table.


• Now this one might be controversial, but I think women hurt themselves when they deny their period affects them. This happens, alot, and I don't understand why. We have hormones, and they change regularly. Don't deny it. The moon goes through phases, the ocean tide swells, and so do we. Some of my friends seem ashamed of their menstruation cycle. One lady I know said something this past week that made me want to add this to the list. She had just started her period at work. I asked her if she was ok and she informed me that her period "didn't effect her." It was almost as if her period was something embarassing to her and that it should be kept a secret. She mentioned that it "wasn't an excuse to act differently." I disagree. I don't think that having your period means you get a free license to act like a sensitive crazy. However, your menstruation cycle does effect you and cause you to behave and feel differently. The sooner you accept and understand that, the more you can handle yourself in a postive way during that time of the month. One tip my mom gave me a few years ago has proven to be helpful. She told me to try and avoid making important/big decisions during my most sensitive days. I laughed at her when she told me that, but I secretly followed her advice and it has saved me some troubles.


• Indoor tanning: don't do it.

Life in the Plants

Yarrow

One calloused finger placed carefully

gives significance to the small spot

at the base of the spine.

Five of my fingers found you.
Five of my fingers enclosed
yarrow: the stem, leaf, and flower.
I was trying to divine the weather
untangle your thoughts
tell your fortune
and induce your dreams: love.

Achilles cured the wounds of the Trojan war
with the small golden leaves.
If he staunched torn flesh
and arrested internal bleeding,
won't you crush these ancient petals in your palm?

Stain it yellow
and believe.