Tuesday, July 13, 2010

Female Support Continued...

In my last post about this topic, I mentioned several ways that females harm themselves. I had a male friend ask, almost as if he was offended, if I thought those errors were limited to "just women." My answer: in the case of the bra advice, yes, this is (hopefully) an error limited to females. All the other errors could be made by men too. I just notice that, as a woman, I make these mistakes, and I see my female friends, coworkers and family members doing the same. I could write about errors that men make, but that would be a different blog :)

Here are a few more things from the list:

  • Women hurt themselves when they don't develop relationships with other women. This one is huge and it probably deserves a post of its own. In fact, my friend Bri and I are going to write a book called You Need Your Bitches. Having healthy relationships with other women can be extremely difficult, but it is essential to be a healthy, happy woman with a sense of humor and a good perspective. I lived in a house with six ladies for two years. Living my life so close to them, day after day, was challenging in so many ways. Before I lived at Westover house, most of my friends were dudes. The ladies were a whole new world. We were able to call eachother out in ways that our guys friends probably wouldn't think about or want to confront us about. Having strong friendships with eachother was easy for the first few months, and then when the party died and the shit hit the fan, we had to make the choice to stay committed or bail. We stayed committed, and I can say that we pulled eachother up out of or through big piles of poo. I know I wouldn't be successful in the ways I am today without their annoying questioning, their tough love, their advice I didn't want to hear, their laughter, and the food they brought to our giant wooden table.

  • Now this one might be controversial, but I think women hurt themselves when they deny their period affects them. This happens, alot, and I don't understand why. We have hormones, and they change regularly. Don't deny it. The moon goes through phases, the ocean tide swells, and so do we. Some of my friends seem ashamed of their menstruation cycle. One lady I know said something this past week that made me want to add this to the list. She had just started her period at work. I asked her if she was ok and she informed me that her period "didn't effect her." It was almost as if her period was something embarassing to her and that it should be kept a secret. She mentioned that it "wasn't an excuse to act differently." I disagree. I don't think that having your period means you get a free license to act like a sensitive crazy. However, your menstruation cycle does effect you and cause you to behave and feel differently. The sooner you accept and understand that, the more you can handle yourself in a postive way during that time of the month. One tip my mom gave me a few years ago has proven to be helpful. She told me to try and avoid making important/big decisions during my most sensitive days. I laughed at her when she told me that, but I secretly followed her advice and it has saved me some troubles.

  • Indoor tanning: don't do it.

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